What`s up with my YouTube "career" ?

Nothing is going on - on YouTube at the moment. And that is the way it is supposed to be until I find a new SERIOUS project, and that I can really say "I can accept this! I do not feel like a moron this time!" I don`t care if you think that I am a moron or an idiot. I could not care less! I ONLY CARE about what I THINK of ME. I am my own biggest critic. I am a perfectionist and everything that I have done in the past has been killing time. I was bored and had no other choice than to kill some time. I did not care WHAT I was doing, I just had to do SOMETHING. But I still have my old videos on my YouTube channel. I will NEVER delete anything! That is very important because I will use all my old videos in future projects. You never know when you want to tell the story about "Who I was back in the day". Don`t we all have that on our minds? To make a movie about our own lives? Jesus! WHAT is wrong with you guys? WHO doesn`t want to do that? ;-)

A lot of videos to choose from on my channel, to really make a weird story, TRUST ME on that!

My YouTube channel:  Mali - My Universe.

That expression "I need a life!" and "GET A LIFE !" is NOT too far-fetched right now and I finally get it. It has finally sunk in. There is truth to these expressions. It`s like you are sitting on the couch, sipping to your tea and waiting for things to happen. Things happen, alright! FASTER than you realize; you get lazy, fat, and then it is TOO LATE! But ONE SWEET DAY, honey, you get shocked by the reflection in the mirror: IS THAT ME?

You get rid of the cake that you bought last night (because you were pretty desperate last night. You have a donut left but you look at it and say; "YOU HAVE DESTROYED MY LIFE!" and "You were kind to me, though, in the time of need." But you are not needy anymore! THOSE DAYS ARE OVER!

HOW many times have you said this to yourself?

"NO! this time things are going to change! I have three new snickers. Neon-pink, neon-yellow, and green! I will run every day after watching "The bold and the beautiful". I am going to dress up like that Jane Fonda and run a mile or two! OR: I am going to do yoga!"

Indecisive again! You know that your only personal goal right now is to burn that belly fat but you can`t seem to get your belly off the couch. A belly that kinda looks like a couch by now.

The same struggle goes for your creative life. You don´t get NOWHERE! YOU ARE STUCK!

Lack of passion! You are depressed? They say it leads to depression. How can it NOT lead to depression when YOU ARE NOT WHERE YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE?!

A change in direction is what you need right now.

And you promise yourself "MORE TO COME!" (But you have no idea what is coming because you don`t know what you are doing.)

A picture that I have used on several occasions where NOTHING HAPPENED! (Several occasions...sounds like I brought the picture to events! That IS NOT having a LIFE! ("Here`s my card, my name is Mali. I am weird and socially awkward. CALL ME!") And when you turn the card over to the other side you see a desperate person with the title "MORE TO COME!") WHAT a scenario!!! I kinda like the scenario. A weird manuscript is writing itself right now inside my mind.

I could have written a few manuscripts to be honest.)

What I mean by this is that I have used the same picture several TIMES.

 That is when we ask ourselves: What will be different THIS TIME?

Thank you for being a tourist passing through Mali`s Universe. Thank you for being a witness of all the stories going on inside my mind. Simultaneously! ;-)