They always find a reason! (The French!)



I started to write this a few days ago, but today it`s Saturday so I actually have TIME today to finish this blog post. It sounds like I`m lazy but I am quiet busy, actually. In France!
Thoughts while having a cup of caffeine. That`s when I think the BEST! That`s when I become the smartest. That`s when I prevent dementia, and that`s when I get a little hyper. The best articles are being written, the best music is being made and the BEST BEATS are being created!  Boom BOOM POW! Okay, maybe too much coffee! ☕
Always smile and be happy! I TRY! I even ACT! "Fake it till you make it!" is NOT a lie. Even when things don`t always work out. Being positive WORKS! Here I was in Norway`s countryside smiling like a superstar with no access to the boulangerie. Bakery in French. πŸŽ‚ I did NOT DIE! (Because in Norway we do have a lot of cake too. Lukket ValnΓΈtt is my favorite.)



You sucked on your lollypop at 3 πŸ˜‚


They say that "Average people don`t make a change". And "Well behaved women don`t make history" I kind of have that mentality and personality myself. But I am well behaved, though. I always felt like I had this life mission to entertain (millions!), so I guess that is why I feel that way. But I completely understand if you don`t want to make a change in this world. It`s not for everyone. But it IS something for ME!πŸ˜‚ And I`m not even kidding! (Okay, I am NOT dramatic, like "Oh, I`m going to save the world!") But I NEVER knew WHY! The why was always a big question mark to me and the HOW was even a bigger question mark. It would have been a lot EASIER for me if I was average and boring and just FIT IN. I can be boring and average too (SUPER BORING!), for a whole week, but I kind of always gravitate back into being this weird, nerdy, atypical outsider. And on the top of that; I`m even an entertainer. (Yeah, it`s weird!) I grew up in a society with too much "whatever - mentality" that created a MONSTER! But the monster would not have been created either if it wasn`t for the fact that I was brought up in a certain way. Okay, okay, I`m kidding! (Actually not...) Even though there`s truth to this I like the "monster" or the person I`ve become. It all stems from the fact that I grew up not caring about ANYTHING at all. Which is not my fault. Too much freedom? I come from a farm. But I guess I didn`t find my true self there.

Just like that Italian lady Francesca in the Bridges Over Madison County - movie said;
"The people are very helpful...It`s very nice here...but it`s not what I dreamed of as a child"

Lack of inspiration just destroys the motivation. Motivation is a very difficult thing to achieve. Especially if you`re surrounded by people who are the opposite of who you are. I didn`t even know somebody who knows somebody like me. Or maybe one lady. A cat lady who lived alone and played the piano, was super cool and "French". The Brigitte Bardot vibe was REAL! Very inspired by this, since I already knew for some reason that I was an entertainer myself. I could have been ten years old at the time, but I already knew when I was 6, so...yeah...fitting in was a HUGE PROBLEM. I went into a state of just closing myself off instead. But I came out of the closet at the age of 25. And here you actually don`t have to. This is almost my fourth year in France and one thing you can do in France is...stop caring "orwhatsoever". Yes! About what you WEAR! The French Riviera, baby! If you lack taste this is the place to go. If you want to combine your hippie native american dresses with some bling bling and just go crazy with the make up you`ve come to the right place. If you`re 70 and still have a great body, you can show off your yellowish riviera tan in a coctail dress.πŸ˜‚ And the bling bling! It is totally normal. You can also look like you`re a member of the Norwegian political party FRP by being super rude, bitchy and ignorant. Nobody cares. Haven`t tried this attitude yet. Maybe something to try one day. At the health insurance office! Just trying the French facial expressions could be a start. "I du nut knuw angleish! No english! FRENCH! You are in FRANCE!" and with a very dissapointed facial expression. They act like they have no idea what you`re talking about. With a duck mouth. No injections, just making this expression with the face; like you are a total IDIOT! You actually are, though, You can never outsmart the French culture and their education system. It starts in maternelle from they`re 3 years old. They are smart. And you`re lazy. Did you start school at 3? Where they EXPLAIN WHY you should act a certain way and learn etiquette? NO! Not if you`re Northern European like me. You sucked on your lollypop at 3. 


Looking kinda shaky


I got this response the time I wanted to register myself in the French "securite sociale"; "NO ENGLISH!" I stood there, looking kinda shaky. (Real translation:"Go back to your country!") "How many more times do I have to return now?" I decided to return the next day, which became the next week...and then I met a kind woman who actually "helped me". "Here`s the form that you can fill out!" That was the first page. The second page had all the difficult steps that I had to follow. In French. To get to the next level in France you need a bank account. (They don`t accept a non-French bank. Unless it`s SWISS!πŸ’°) but to get the bank account you kind of have to rent an apartment so that you can show off the last 3 rents to the office, or the 3 last electricity bills. You need the bank to get the apartment, you need the apartment to get the bank account...so yeah...just loving it. And they do not appreciate an english speaking person entering that office! Trust me! They`re not having it! Doesn`t matter how many foreign people entering a year. They are not open for a change. You`re not French and if you`re not a member of the "club", you are not a part of the elite. Elite; which is a name they created. But I`ve learned to love the French no matter how much I hate the culture. I hate baguette...but I actually love it with a spoon of orange marmalade on it. It is not something that happens quickly. It happens over time. This might change if I don`t receive my carte vitale soon enough! (The French health insurance card.) I`m looking kinda shaky after so much white bread. You kind of never know. I just got a contract from AXA to secure myself (for some other private reason (Insurance company) They love insurance companies in France! And they always find a reason!) It was in 15 PAGES! 

So, I`m going to leave you now with a selfmade quote, which I am so good at making;

Don`t think it`s OVER after the first couple of contracts the French want you to sign. They will always find another reason for you to sign more contracts! πŸ˜•

 

 
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